The Saga of Speedos
by The Weirdo Club
Summary: A strange curse is spreading around the mountain. Is there anything anyone can do to stop it? (( We are finally getting to re-post this after the hacker :) Enjoy!))
1. Chapter 1

**Hey people – or shall I say vampires? This is a short story Vampanezegirl97 and HOAnubisTS wrote together – and it is NOT to be taken seriously! :D By the way… Jenny is HOAnubisTS, Jeanette is VampGirl… hey, how about you visit our profile and look at the names of the people in the Weirdo Club? :P **

**Caution: May cause nightmares... unless you're a – slightly too enthusiastic - Crepsley fangirl. **

"Try harder, Darren," snapped Larten, trying to contain his impatience. They'd been training for hours - and still, his assistant was hopeless at martial arts. He struck at Darren with his tough nails again, but the boy reacted too late and was struck in the arm.

"I'm doing the best I can..." Darren growled back, jumping to the side to avoid getting jabbed by his mentor's nails.

"Better than before-at least you can last 2 minutes without taking a hit," Larten commented-they had moved onto blocking attacks only half an hour earlier.

Darren smiled with pride just as Larten pounced-he jumped in the air, and landed straight on top of his assistant-nails positioned to strike. "Though no longer than that..."

Upon hearing Darren's loud yelp, Jenny was in the room instinctively. She checked the room for any potential dangers, and when she found none, she went back to scowling at Larten. "Don't you think he's had enough practice?" she inquired. The orange-haired vampire chortled, as if what she had just said was somehow amusing. "Enough practice?" he scoffed. "He has barely done anything." Darren's pained expression said the contrary. "He's worn out, Carrot Head." Larten frowned at the girl once again, irritated by the nickname she had given him and how frequently she used it. "Fine, Darren may go, but I must tell you I am not-" Before he could finish, they were both gone, and he was seldom on his own.

He sighed sadly, wishing for once that Darren would take his training seriously- the young vampire was always reluctant to try new techniques, and hardly ever stopped complaining. He raised his hand to his head and rubbed the scar that held its place of honor on his cheek. He turned on his heels, planning to go to the Hall of Kheldon Lurt, but stopped as when loud music started to blast into the gaming halls.

Whirling round to see what the source was, he saw a small object - a cphone, he believed it was called - perched precariously on a rock. Jenny had obviously dropped it... but why was it making such a racket? He picked it up and fumbled it in his hand, clicking on buttons desperately to make it stop. Then the lyrics of the song caught his attention.

"When I walk in the spot, this is what I see - everybody stops and they staring at me." He raised an eyebrow- wondering who in the name of Charna could call this music. And-on even more pressing matter- how the person singing this so-called song had got through life with such bad grammar. He shook his head at the thought of even thinking of some of this terrible use of the English language in front of Seba. "I got passion in my pants and I ain't afraid to show it..."

Suddenly, he felt himself flex uncontrollably. His fingers tightened into a strong fist, and he was sweating profusely. He was smiling - smiling even though he was petrified of what was going on. "I'M SEXY AND I KNOW IT!" Just as that line was heard, with on swift jerk, his beloved cape was ripped off and thrown on the floor carelessly. Then, his pants, and then, his shirt. Finally, after the spasms went away, he found himself dressed only in a bright red speedo - a speedo he could have sworn he never put on.

He didn't have enough time to be mortified, because soon enough, his hips were swinging wildly – furiously, almost. With a distraught, yet, somehow, cheerful, expression on his face, he tried to stop himself, yet it was no use.

"This is a curse…" he muttered. His movements were becoming more enthusiastic and dynamic by the second.

"Hey, Carrot Head, I forgot my phone, have you-" Jenny returned to get her phone, but the sight before her eyes made her freeze with shock. "Larten… what are you doing?!"

**REVIEW!**

**((Hey! Finally got to re-posting some of these stories! Hopefully more chapters and stories on the way! Thanks for waiting and being supportive through the entire ordeal of the hacker and us just being lazy. -Saphire Bethany Stacy Skyle))**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello people! Ready for more nightmares? XD**

"Help me, Jenny!" Larten begged, seeing the young girl enter the hall. "Please? I cannot Stop"

"Are you...are you..." She stuttered-unable to believe what she was seeing "CHARNA'S GUTS! I think I'm gonna be...be sick..." She looked down at the floor and clutched her stomach, she truly felt sick-Before looking back up at Larten who was now thrusting even harder and quicker ."Oh my..." she whispered quietly, before falling to the ground. The horrible sight had made her faint.

Meanwhile, Darren was waiting outside. The air was chilly, but Jenny had told him to stay put - so he did. Finally, the chill ran through his bones, and he decided to return to the cave to look for her. "Girls..." he thought, mildly irritated. "Why do they take such a long time to do a simple task?" He walked into the entrance and called for Jenny, but tripped over something under his feet. He winced as his forehead slammed against the floor... but that was nothing compared to what he was about to see. Jenny, was on the floor, passed out, looking as distressed as ever. And behind her, was his mentor, thrusting powerfully dressed in nothing but a red speedo. His face was the shade of scarlet his speedo was. "Darren, listen to me, you have got to-" Larten tried tell him what to do, but Darren was to frightened to obey him.

"SOMEONE! JENNY'S FAINTED! LARTEN'S..." he cried, hoping a passer-byer would hear him. `"LARTEN'S..." he repeated "I don't know...just...just help" He knelt down next to Jenny-at the end near the cave entrance, as far away from his Mentor as possible. `"Darren? Are you listening to me?" Mr Crepsley asked, but he ignored him. He heard a gasp and turned around as Kurda entered the hall. "Kurda..help..." Darren cried. " Darren? Jenny? LARTEN?" Kurda gasped "by the black blood of Harnon Oan... WHAT'S HAPPENING IN HERE?"

"I do not know, but you need to-" "HELP JENNY!" Darren cut him off pleadingly.

Kurda rushed to Jenny - and like Darren, tried to avoid the sight of the ginger vampire. He inspected her gravely, then glanced at Larten shortly. "We will have to tell the princes." "What? Do we have to?" exclaimed Larten. They, again, ignored him. "I'll carry Jenny," Darren offered. "You... deal with... him." Kurda scowled, clearly displeased, but didn't complain. "The Hall isn't that far from here, anyway..."

"What am I supposed to-" Kurda began, but was talking to himself. Darren had already grabbed Jenny and rushed off to the hall of Princes. The blonde vampire groaned, stepping forward towards Larten-but covering his eyes at the same time. He took a deep breath and reached out to touch the elder vampire before stopping. He could hear music that he couldn't hear before-or wasn't paying attention to before. It seemed to be coming from a small box under Lartens feet. "The music, Kurda." Larten shouted. "It started with the music. Please-turn it off!" Kurda bent down-staying as far away from Larten as possible, which was difficult- and picked up the box he believed was called a phone. He looked at the screen that read "Sarah calling". He had no idea what that meant, and dint want to find out. In hope, he threw the phone to the ground and stomped on it-crushing it to almost nothing but dust, and stopping the music.

Larten's movements became less and less dynamic, until finally he was still. In a moment of glee, he threw his arms around Kurda, but quickly let go as he was wearing basically nothing. He refused to go into the Hall of Princes undressed, so he made Kurda wait for him while he put on his cape and undergarments. "That was disgusting," Kurda sighed. Larten could only nod in agreement. Soon enough, the four were at doors of the the hall of princes.

"Do we have to do this?" Larten sighed. "Yes-we do. Technically you caused harm to another member of the clan-" Kurda began. "You mean Jenny?" "Aye." "That was not me. That was no one. It was coincidental." But he didn't have time to argue further as Darren put his hand on the wall panel. He stepped inside-still carrying Jenny who was only half conscious-and was soon followed by Kurda. Larten stood awkwardly at the door "Must I?" he asked-Kurda and Darren only nodded in reply-so he took a deep breath and entered to look at the face of three very stern looking vampire princes. Out of all the things Larten believed he'd have to do in his life-this was not one of them.

"What is it you want?" Mika called majestically - and carelessly, too. Today had been tough, and he didn't want to be disturbed by this group that usually brought mischief with them wherever they went. "Well-" Darren started off. This was going to be harder than he thought it would be - how was he going to phrase it? "Well, you see, Larten here-" Kurda tried. "Um... he..." Paris clucked his tongue. "We have no time to waste. Tell us - or leave."

"Well..." Darren sighed, then burst into a full explanation of what happened-or what he knew. Kurda helped at bits and Larten-though he knew the entire story-stayed perfectly silent, obviously embarrassed. "This is a very serious matter." Paris nodded. "Aye." Arrow agreed "But what of the girl, has she awoken yet." Darren nodded towards the floor, where Jenny lay. She was half awake and her eye lids kept opening then falling back again. "No harm has come to her." Kurda spoke for him "But i believe she is very traumatized-as we all are. This experience shall forever haunt us."

Jenny awoke slowly, and rubbed her eyelids as if to ward off a bright light. "Where am I?" Then she looked around the hall of princes, and rose to her feet immediately. "Hello, Princes..." she muttered. "Why am I here?" Darren groaned and re-told her what happened with Kurda adding in bits again. "Oh.. I remember," she giggled. "You must really like the song, Carrot Head."

Larten scowled. "I have never heard that song before-and i do not wish to hear it again." "Yeah, none of us want to see that again either, you know!" Darren added, causing Jenny to giggle. "You have to admit!" she laughed "It was quite funny...if not disturbing!" "I am glad you found the funny side of things, Jenny." Paris grinned "As life is nothing without some humor." His face darkened. "Though this is an important matter, Larten. You say you were not in control of your actions?" Larten shook his head. "I believe you-but something caused this, and it cannot be ignored."

"It was just the song, I suppose," Jenny offered, shrugging her shoulders. "Still... this has caused you to pass out. What if it happens again?" Arrow frowned. Jenny shrugged again. "They could just laugh it off," she said coolly. "And anyway, the only reason I fainted was because I know Larten personally." The princes started to squabble, but Paris silenced them. "Very well. We will let it go, but just this time." He got off his throne, and patted him on the back good-naturedly. "I'm starving, anyway. I think I'll settle with some bat broth." Almost on cue... Jenny's phone started to ring again. Everyone grimaced as they knew what was going to happen... ... but as Larten started dancing... so did Paris.

But it was too late to save him. Larten's curse had spread, and once you caught it...there was no going back.

**REVIEW! PLEASE! It'll make us happy!**

**((Yay! Re-post of chapter two! All the remaining chapters for this are still MIA. We will try and hunt them down though.-Saphire Bethany Stacy Skyle))**


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